Lead me on

"How do you be a real Christian?" The little girl's face showed the sincerity of her question. I'm sure my face betrayed the shock I felt. A friend and I were substitute teaching at an Awana class here in Ozark, Arkansas. We were simply sharing about our experiences overseas. We didn't even give the Gospel message. God obviously had other plans for this night.

After the class I sat down with the little girl and shared the whole Gospel with her. She eagerly received Jesus into her heart. After we prayed together I explained that all of heaven was having a party because she met Jesus. Her face lit up and I knew that she will never be the same.

The past month has been very difficult for me. I call it post-Asia trauma. God did so much in my life and through my life in the two months I was on outreach but now that I'm home I feel slightly at a loss of what to do. I am staffing here in Ozark until December and then I don't know what I should do. I keep crying out to the Lord asking for direction and He keeps reminding me that He is directing me. He directed me back to Ozark. He directed me to Awana class that night. Then He directed me to His little girl who needed to meet with Him.

So, my prayer for this time of my life is simply this: Lead me on, Lord.

My Paper Kite

I have to decorate my room. Seriously, I have been back here in Ozark for nearly 4 months and people walk in my room and ask if anyone lives there. It is BLAH. So, to solve this problem I decided to decorate my walls with handmade kites. "How hard could it possibly be to make a kite?" I asked myself incredulously. So, this afternoon I began looking for building materials for my kites.

I have this special paper that I bought at Wal-Mart for $8.50. It was very hard for me to fork up that much cash for paper but it's very special paper. It's all different colors with fancy patterns and stickers and other fun accessories. I use this special paper very sparingly.

But today as I was contemplating the handmade kites for my wall I knew that it would only look good with my special paper. The question was...am I willing to risk it? This may sound very silly to you but to me it was a very big decision. I am really terrible at crafty things and statistically based on past projects the kites had about a 5% chance of looking good. Did I really want to break out my special paper for something that was probably going to fail?

Ironically, we talked about risk in DTS class today. The teacher, Michael Leeson, talked about how each person is designed by God and He gives us each gifts and callings. The question is are we willing to step into our gifts and callings and risk failing.

So, I decided to go for it. And you know what? They look terrible just as I predicted. But I'm so glad I went for it. And I'm going to keep trying until they look beautiful...even if it means using all of my special paper. I want to be who God created me to be and do what He made me to do...even if I fail at first. Try, try again.

Enough

"Your grace is enough," I sang loudly as we gathered for campus worship. It was Monday morning and our Discipleship Training School (DTS) was officially starting in 10 minutes. My mind was frantically asking God for help. If you had a seat in the auditorium of my brain you might have heard something like this:

"God, what am I going to do? There are students in this room that are entrusted to my care. I need You, I need You, I need You. Help, help, help."

Never have I felt such desperation...and never has God given me such reassurance and peace. Just as the panic was rising in my heart, I heard what I was singing with my mouth. "Your grace is enough, Your grace is enough, Your grace is enough for me."

Instantly peace settled in my heart. I have so much to learn in the next 5 months and I'm so glad that the God of all wisdom and grace is here to teach me.

Hopeful's Progress

I love reading and the great thing about preparing to lead a Discipleship Training School is that you are required to read a lot. This morning my co-leader and I had a meeting with our base director and he gave us 10 books to read...on top of the other 3 books I'm reading.

The book that is impacting me the most is Pilgrim's Progress. I just can't put it down. I feel the adventurous spirit in me stir everytime Christian and his fellows encounter a new obstacle. The scariest part (so far) is when Christian encounters Apollyon. He is almost destroyed but God gives him His own strength in the midst of Christian's great weakness. BAM! Christian overcomes and is able to move on in the journey...getting closer to the Celestial City.

Lately I have felt weighed down as I think of the obstacles to come. I think of leading this DTS, going to India and all the other things I don't feel ready for. But as I read of Christian's perseverance in light of God's faithfulness I am assured that we are more than conquerers. I've realized that overcoming the obstacle is not the goal...but getting closer to that Celestial City is what I must be focused on. Closer to the one who holds my yesterdays and tomorrows.

My Girls

"Hey, can I talk now?"

"I'm related to Miley Cyrus!"

"No you're not!! Liar!"

Welcome to my 4th grade girls sunday school class at James River Assembly of God. I volunteered at James River having no idea what they would have me do. I didn't dream in a million years that they would let me teach a class of 20 girls by myself...they didn't even know me. Nevertheless they asked me to lead a class for one of the services and it's been one of my favorite parts of the week.

Today was my last Sunday because I'm headed to YWAM Ozarks in a few days. The girls were sad and gave me a hug goodbye. Every week I gave them a country to pray for and they assured me they would pray for their countries faithfully. These girls are in 4th grade and they are already praying for the nations. Their hearts are already set on something other than themselves. What an honor to get to teach them and be around them.